How You Are Getting In Your Own Way Every Day and How To Stop Now

How You Are Getting In Your Own Way Every Day and How To Stop Now,, Rachel Thompson, book marketing

While I primarily write for authors, this article can really apply to anyone, because I see this daily from people and sometimes, if I’m truly honest with myself, I have to kick my own ass. We all have opportunities daily to achieve some kind of goals, whether it’s running that extra mile, eating less, writing more, but, for whatever reason, we don’t. We’re tired, emotionally, physically, mentally. Life is hard, man.

I get it. We say yes to too many damn things.

This article is not about saying no (though sometimes, that’s a great option when you’re feeling overwhelmed), but about how to take that negative self-talk that is stopping you from creating the opportunities to sell books, connect with readers, market your work, your business, whatever it is that you do.

I don’t personally find a lot of motivation in self-help books, daily quotes, and all that generic stuff. I look for something deeper and more meaningful, that’s still action-oriented. If I can’t implement it right then and there, forgetaboutit.

This is what I do to motivate myself.

Let’s deconstruct.

How You Are Getting In Your Own Way

Raise your hand if you have said this:

I Don’t Have the Time 

as to why you can’t:

  • blog
  • create an author platform
  • do social media
  • learn how to do social media correctly
  • create an SEO-optimized website/blog
  • learn what SEO and optimized even mean
  • create a newsletter rather than spamming mass emails to people
  • I’ll stop here before our heads explode.

Well, newsflash: none of us has the time, so you have to change your paradigm. Somehow, some way, you have to make this bookselling, book marketing gig a priority if writing and being a professional author is your goal. So, change your thinking.

Ask yourself these questions: Do I really not have the time or do I need to reprioritize? Am I a professional writer? How important is selling and marketing my books?  Am I truly committed to this? 

No need to fight with yourself or come up with further excuses (i.e., yea, sure but I can’t afford not to work, etc… we’ll cover that below). Just answer the questions! The point of this exercise is to assess your commitment to not only writing, but to the business of writing. These are two very different animals. You can sit at your computer and pump out book after book after book, which will sit in a nice, neat little pile for time immemorial, or you can learn the business of selling and marketing your work correctly (hello, this does not mean spamming “buy my book!” links on social media).

Besides, you’re talking about how you don’t have the time to market on Facebook. What’s that about?

BadRedhead Media,, what's holding you back?

If you have time to complain on Facebook that you don’t have the time to market your book, you have the time.

 I Can’t Afford It

Many of us are on a limited income (as a single mom, I understand this concept), however, as an entrepreneur, I’m also able to not place limits on myself as well. I look at my parents, in their seventies, who are still figuring out ways to earn. That drive to work hard fires me every day. I’ve worked since I was fourteen and I’m not stopping anytime soon. Plus, I absolutely love what I do! Writing, book marketing, helping others. Come on!

“I can’t afford it,” is simply another excuse, and while I realize that to some it’s not an excuse (it’s their real life), please bear with me.

Most of the suggestions I offered in the Free 30-day Book Marketing Challenge were free — some offered very low-cost paid options (i.e., for Hootsuite, Buffer, ManageFlitter) that cost maybe $8-$12/month. Blogging is free. Social media is free. Researching opps to market your work is free.

It’s an excuse to write off so many free book marketing opportunities to “I can’t afford it” when you can, but you are choosing (because yes, it is a choice) not to because you’ve told yourself you have zero budget and ‘everything costs money,’ when that’s simply not true. Sure, there are plenty of spendy opps, and those are not right for you at this time; that doesn’t mean you can’t do any book advertising or book marketing. It only means you need to get more creative and do more research.

Are you taking advantage of opportunities already afforded you? Are you part of groups who will support you? Websites that need updating? Blog and guest blogs that are just waiting for you to send them a post? People generally want to help — just remember to acknowledge them. Remember your etiquette when asking for help.

Ask yourself these questions: Can I not afford free tools or am I just making excuses not to do the work? What do I have now that can help me achieve my goals? What free resources can I use to help me get there? 

If you take the time to peruse my site, you’ll find many free tools to help you market your work or business; you can also sign up now for my newsletter to beta read the 30-day Challenge Book or help me out and purchase a low-priced copy when I release it in May.

I Can’t Do It

Oh my, I hear this one a lot. In my post on adult learners, I get more into this topic, but mainly what’s driving you here: fear. Good, old-fashioned, ‘I’m afraid I will fail so I won’t even try’ fear.

Sadly, I see this all the time. I work with a number of authors who shall remain nameless who got the publishing contract! Created a gorgeous, amazing book! And….that’s it. They realize they need to book market, and in many cases, have a talented book  manager who is helping them — yet, they still do nothing. Or they whine, “I can’t do it. It’s too hard” and so they don’t.

It’s easier to do nothing than to do well, anything, right? 

I have a hard time wrapping my head around this one — it’s just not in my nature. I often become frustrated with authors like this. It took me talking with one of these authors to really understand her roadblock: she’s terrified of failing, of looking the fool to family and friends. When I talked with other authors who are in similar situations, if it’s not the time and money thing, it’s also fear.

Sound familiar?

Ask yourself these questions: Am I really incapable of connecting with readers, or am I afraid to? Do I really not ‘get’ social media, or have I just not given it enough time to learn? How can I change my thought patterns from ‘I can’t’ to ‘I can’t go wrong?’ (Source: happinez magazine, April, 2016)

It’s like we tell our kids (if you have them or teach them): you can do it, you’re choosing not to.

The best way to learn a new skill is to practice it. Do it. So get over yourself already.

Bottom line: Get out of your own way and as I always say, do the work. More, next week.

Want to learn how to sell more books? Sign up now to be a BadRedhead Media 30-day Challenge Book Marketing betareader! Subscribe to my BadRedhead Media newsletter and we’ll sign you up to beta-read an early copy of my new book. 
Sign up for my newsletter and never miss a post again! I will never share your email and that’s a promise. Follow me on Twitter @RachelintheOC or @BadRedheadMedia for social media, branding, or marketing help. Increase your blog traffic by participating in #MondayBlogs (a Twitter meme I created to share posts on Mondays — no book promo)
All content © 2016 by BadRedhead Media aka Rachel Thompson, author, unless otherwise specified. All rights reserved. Permission is granted to use short quotes provided a link back to this page and proper attribution is given to me as the original author.


(This week’s tough love has been brought to you by me being over myself. No humans were harmed in the creation of this post. I cannot guarantee the same for next week.)




  1. Nikolay Stoyanov on March 25, 2016 at 8:57 am

    Really nice article. To be honest, fear is the biggest inhibitor. It prevents us, not only to blog, write articles, do SEO, but also to live. But, unless you try new things, you will never discover your hidden potential.

  2. jenniferjohnson781 on June 22, 2016 at 10:39 am

    Rachel, so many truths and motivators in this article. After handing over designs and websites to clients, too many times I see no further actions beyond letting their website sit there. The next step is to always to market yourself and drive people to your website whether that is through social media, paid ads, or handing out business cards and there really should be no excuses.

  3. […] you’re not blogging, you might think you can skip over this section, but you need this more than ever. Three […]

  4. […] blog posts, […]

Leave a Comment